169: The Sad Reality

17 Oct

One of my dearest friends lost her mother to cancer. The family has lived with this knowledge for a year. Her mother’s story is interesting. It is traveled. It is full of love and courage and bravery and relationships and family. None of us has a story like this. I watched my beautiful friend stand up and tell her mother’s story with her brother. I could never do something like give an obituary. Never.

My dear friend just kept repeating how much this just sucks. Saying goodbye forever to your mother does just suck. I know we all have to one day say goodbye, but I would just prefer not to.

The minister just kept talking about heaven is home and a place without pain. Why do people say this and think this will help? That doesn’t help! He also said how people never think about death. You know what? I think about death ALL time. I think about the songs at my funeral, what I want to happen, what my wishes are, if things are in order, blah, blah, blah. ALL the time. I’ve been that way for along time. I can remember when I was kid I was certain I would not live long because I never dreamed about what the future would be like or what I would do when I grow up.

Anyway, aside from holding my friend’s hand through day, the best part if the day was my friend’s aunt invited us to her house and cooked a homemade Vietnamese lunch. It was amazing! She even sent me home with food.

Being together as a family and showing my daughter that friends take the day off for each other and hold each other’s hands through tough days.

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